Ask Jason Anything 4.5: Answers

Ok, Let's see what's in the mail bag this week.

gwenyfer writes:

Why does Selma Blair have to suck so bad? Why?! And why in the hell are they bringing her back to crap up the second Hellboy movie? Sweet Jesus, Why?!

The cause of both problems is Reese Witherspoon. Everything she comes into contact with somehow manages to turn to both shit and gold at the same time. Movie after movie with inane plot lines and horrible acting that somehow rake in money by the dump truck full. She seems to be able to infect co-stars now as well. Despite a complete lack of ability they continue to find work. And then inexplicably the movies don't tank and they get more work...it's a vicious cycle. Look for Joaquin Phoenix to star in Teletubbies: The Movie sometime in 2009. It'll gross $784 million worldwide.

lucybfly writes:

What is the meaning of...death? :)

All stories need an ending. [=|:-P

raivyn writes:

Snorkel or avocado?

Snorkel, I fucking hate avocados. Even if I'm starving to death I'll eat the snorkel first.

two write hands writes:

How many times have you "left a penny" at the convenience store?

On the floor when I've exactly dropped one? Dozens. In the tray for the deadbeats who can't afford the extra 2 cents? Zero.

That's it for this week.