Jason's Incredibly Lame Blog: 2006

Tuesday, December 26, 2006

Merry Christmas

A happy belated Christmas to all 3 of my readers. I hope you got all the stuff you wished for, I got a lot of the items on my list, most of which were gift certificates for various places. For our home made gift exchange I got a cool bust of Spider-man made by my cousin (thanks again Jen). I got another item that appears to be a medieval torture device but is actually for flipping steaks on the barbecue, a few DVD's, this years Hallmark Star Trek ornament and a giant Red Dragon figure. The diet went out the window all day (and the day before which was my Grandma's 90th bday), but I don't think I did to bad, only ate a couple of thousand or so more calories than I normally would have, most of it in various chocolate forms. Well enough about me, did anyone else get anything cool?

Monday, December 18, 2006

Quit shitting on my childhood

The Riverdale gang are getting a makeover for 2007 to make them look more modern, and the stories themselves will also be changed to a more traditional 24 pages, as opposed to the quick, 6 page perfect for reading on the john stories. Hey fuckhats, you think maybe you could have made Betty look a little more anorexic? Not quite enough media imagery out there to make girls feel bad about themselves already.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Douche of the Week

Well it's been a month or so since I've done Douche of the week, but I found a deserving individual this week, Rabbi Elazar Bogomilsky. Now I wouldn't normally go after a religious leader but I think I said "fuck" 20 times reading this article, and it's only 8 paragraphs long. The Reader's Digest version is as follows. The Rabbi threatened to sue the Seattle-Tacoma Airport authority if they didn't put a giant fucking menorah next to their display of Christmas trees. In response the airport took down all of their decorations before they had to deal with the avalanche of complaints from representatives of every other religion demanding that they put up some giant symbol of their faith. Look fuckwit, a Christmas tree isn't a religious symbol. I'm an atheist and there, standing in my living room, covered in Star Trek and cartoon ornaments is a Christmas tree. Not a menorah to be found either. Wanna sue me you litigious fuck?

Update:

Rabbi tucks tail and runs. He's still a douche for threatening to sue in the first place.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

Damn Diet...

Christmas time is upon us and I'm jonesing for some gingerbread cookies, but if I make gingerbread cookies, I'll eat gingerbread cookies. Then I might as well just go wash back a Big Mac with an Egg Nog milkshake and top it off with a gallon of Coke. Stupid Holidays with all their stupid temptations...

Currently back down to 285 after ballooning up some for my birthday. 35 more pounds until they'll let me jump out of an airplane.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Taking latex clothing to the next level...

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

A new post...

Ya, I've been a little lax in posting lately. So sue me.

Things I've been watching or listening to lately.

TV - Currently watching the following, all of which I recommend you should be watching as well. Dexter, Heroes, Studio 60, Boston Legal, CSI: New York, Jericho, Show Me The Money, CSI and My Name is Earl. Anxiously awaitng the start of a new season for Sleeper Cell, 24 and The Shield.

Movies - Went and saw Borat a couple of weeks ago. Verrrrry Nice. Saw The Fountain opening night. The only word that comes to mind is "horrendous". Saw Casino Royale this weekend, without a doubt the best bond movie since Sean Connery had brown hair. Watched Domino on DVD, it was okay, just go annoyed when they turned what was a supposedly based on real events story and turned it into a Die Hard sequel.

Music - Currently rocking the iPod in heavy rotation are the new Beatles album, Love, and Matisyahu's sophomore studio album, Youth. That's right I'm an atheist who listens to Hassidic Jewish Reggae. I'm complex.

Video Games - Playing the shit out of Need For Speed: Carbon on my PS2. Man I want to unleash some my 'l33t driving skillz in the real world. I don't think my 4 door sedan would handle as well as the Porsche or Lotus I have in the game though.

Food - Well, 30th birthday week was "skip the diet a little every day week", so I had a bunch of food that I hadn't eaten since the summer, including cheesecake, french fries and pizza. Still no Mickey D's, she who can't be named in this blog keeps saying that has to wait until Valentine's Day. All in all it wasn't to detrimental to the waistline, I put on 3 pound over the week. I'm currently floating around 287 lbs. 37 more lbs until I can jump out of an airplane.

That's what's new here. What's new with everyone else?

....Not another year wiser.

With the flying spaghetti monster as my witness I will never - ever - again drink more than one pint of mead on any given day.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Another year older...

People who share my birthday:

Jonathan Swift (1667)
Mark Twain (1835)
Winston Churchill (1874)
Dick Clark (1929)
Ridley Scott (1937)
David Mamet (1947)
Billy Idol (1955)
Colin Mochrie (1957)
Bo Jackson (1962)
Ben Stiller (1965)
Elisha Cuthbert (1982)

Friday, November 10, 2006

If Peter Griffin had a sex change...

Saturday, November 04, 2006

I'll bet you do, Albert.

Friday, November 03, 2006

F*&$ing Regina

Fucking Regina , no Borat movie having piece of shit city.

Ask Jason Anything IX: Answers

Here be the answers!

Gwenhwyfar writes:

Doing (or have done) anything exciting for Halloween?

I ate a salad and went to work...the fun never stops in Jasonland.

My hand hurts for no apparent reason... please explain.

What you do in the privacy of your own home is none of my business.

Is it wrong for me to think "It's Friday, where the hell are the answers?"?

Answers were slightly impeded, by whiskey, from falling out of my brain.

Anonymous writes:

Is it wrong for me to think Mark Walberg is a good actor?

Good actor? No that's not wrong. I've enjoyed Marky Mark in some movies (he's good in The Departed for example). Had you said that you thought he was a Great actor though you would need to be flogged.

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Ask Jason Anything IX

You know the drill by now. You ask the questions, I supply the answers on Thursday.

5 Things I like right now...

I figured I'd give some of my current favourite things a plug...I'm sure all involved will be thrilled for the free advertising on this immensely popular and traffic laden website. In no particular order...

My iPod - push play, put on headphones, annoying co-workers disappear.
Heroes - NBC, Monday nights. If you aren't watching the best new show this year you are missing out.
Penn Radio - available as a free podcast the day after it airs on regular radio, Penn Jillette's daily radio show is an always entertaining hour in which you never know if you'll hear a discussion on American politics or stories about monkeys (I suppose the 2 could be covered on one show).
This American Life - The best show on public radio is now available for free through iTunes.
Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip - The smartest drama on network TV today will likely be cancelled this week and that makes me sad. Remember kids, the vast majority of people don't like biting satire or polysyllabic words.

Douche of the Week: A bit delayed

Ya, I should have done this last week, but this piece of shit is still a giant douche, Rush Limbaugh. This time the bloated, drug addicted, Jabba the Hutt looking pile of verbal diarrhea decided to rip in to Michael J. Fox, claiming that he was both A) faking his Parkinson's symptoms and B) Claiming he was only in favour of stem cell research because it would help him. Well, A) I hope you get Parkinson's you whale so you can see what the symptoms are really like and B) No Shit, Sherlock. Would there be a Michael J. Fox foundation if he didn't have Parkinson's? Likely not, but that doesn't make him any less sincere about wanting to find a cure for a horrible disease. You will find that most people who work the hardest for causes have been personally effected by whatever it is they are trying to solve. That doesn't make them wrong. Do the world a favour, go home and get you maid to score some more hillbilly heroin for you and swallow the whole bottle.

I'mmmmmmmm Back

okay okay okay, enough of the grief (from all 3 of my readers), my vacation from blogging is over. On to some new posts.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Personal Grooming Tips from Andy Kaufman

Thursday, October 12, 2006

Ask Jason Anything VIII: Answers

Another week of answers to your questions...

G writes:

Why does Coke taste so much better from a glass bottle as opposed to a plastic bottle or aluminum can? Also---why do they not sell glass bottle cokes all year round?

Chemically speaking the glass doesn't add anything to the coke. Plastic and the finish inside aluminum cans both dissolve somewhat into the coke very slightly altering the recipe and affecting the taste. Glass coke bottles are available year round, you just have to know where to look. The cost of the packaging makes them more expensive than plastic or cans and thusly your local convenience store doesn't carry them. Try a specialty candy store.

Gwenhwyfar writes:

What's your opinion of Superman?
Also, what do you think of Harvey Birdman?

Superman is very time and writer dependant. I like the young unsure of himself Superman from Smallville or the excellent Jeph Loeb/Tim Sale Superman for All Seasons. But once he got older and figured out just how powerful he is, why are there still villains (or despots for that matter) out there? Seriously, he's freakin' Superman. He could clean up the whole planet in a week but he doesn't. I think he's a glory hound who likes seeing his name in the paper every day. Birdman rocks.

Amanda writes:

Why do chicken caesar pitas taste so damned good?

This was a first for Ask Jason Anything. I've never eaten a chicken caesar pita so I went and got one for lunch today and I'm afraid I'll have to disagree with you, I didn't think it tasted that good at all. I've been eating a lot of chicken caesar salads lately and this pita wasn't a good substitute at all. I got mine from the Pita Pit, do you get these good tasting ones somewhere else?

Holly writes:

What should I be for halloween at work?

The scariest thing possible at Access, Sasktel president and CEO Robert Watson.

Abraham Lincoln Portrait

Douche of the Week

There were many possibilities this week, but the award has to go to North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il. If for no other reason than his ridiculous hair cut. Hey Kim Jong Douche how about you try feeding your people instead of compensating for your tiny Asian prick by sabre rattling with George Bush. Great, you've got a couple of little nuclear weapons that apparently don't work correctly and he has 6000 that do work. Why don't you take a lesson from the Chinese and make friends with the US and take their money, Americans love to buy shoddily made Asian crap.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Review: 2nd Generation iPod Nano

This thing freakin' rocks. I've been using it tons and can't find anything to complain about. I plug it into the computer in the morning when I get home from work and it deletes all the podcasts that I listened to the night before, while iTunes downloads fresh new podcasts and copies them on to the iPod. Battery life is phenomenal, I listen to the thing for probably 10 hours every night and I've yet to see the battery indicator drop below 50%. It has a few features I wasn't expecting like an address book, clock and stop watch. If you are looking for an MP3 player you would be hard pressed to find something better.

Ask Jason Anything VIII

I wasn't going to bother doing Ask Jason Anything this week as it hasn't been as popular as I'd hoped in recent weeks but I have a question asked any way so I might as well make it official. So go ahead and ask some questions. Answers tomorrow.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

A Daily Show Classic - from Regina

Friday, October 06, 2006

What celebretard do you look like?

It's the site that's taking the internet by storm, using highly complex facial recognition software to show you what celebrity it thinks you look like.

I submitted this picture:

And it came back with these most likely matches.

Clearly they don't have Marc Price aka Skippy from Family Ties in their database

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Ask Jason Anything VII: Answers

Here are the answers to this weeks questions

Once again, the mail bag was quite light this week. Oh well just makes it easier for me.

Gwenwyfar writes:

Why does everyone insist on going 50 down Vic now that they've upped the speed limit to 70?

Because 98.7% of the people in this city have no idea how to drive a car, and I think it gets worse by the week. Regina drivers will win Douche of the Week on of these weeks, mark my word.

Are you required to be a pompous asshole in order to be a specialist or is it just a perk?

I think it's just a perk that comes with the job. Doctor shortage + skills = ability to be an ass. Had another exciting trip to the doctor's office this week, didja?

Post #300 - A new feature

I figured that for my 300th post on this blog I should do something special and thus a new weekly feature is born. Each week I will choose one deserving individual to be the Douche of the Week.

This week the award goes to US senate majority leader Bill Frist who managed to sneak his anti-online gambling bill through the senate by paper clipping it to a port security bill. Once the president signs off on the bill it will become illegal within 270 days for US financial institutions to transfer money to any online gambling site (and the narrow minded twits regard poker as "gambling" not the skill game that it actually is). So for ruining the fun of millions of potential voters (in an election year, you moron) you get the award this week. Stick it someplace uncomfortable. I'm going to miss cleaning out the Americans at the online poker tables.

Monday, October 02, 2006

New Weird Al Video, "White and Nerdy"

Ask Jason Anything VII

If you don't know the drill by now check out some of the previous Ask Jason Anything posts. As always answers on Thursday.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

The Ultimate Car Wash

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Ask Jason Anything VI: Answers

Not much in the mailbag this week.

Gwenhwyfar writes:

Why do I sneeze every time I get a headache?

Because you are some sort of freak. Seek employment in a sideshow somewhere. Also, you own cats, that probably has something to do with it as well.

Well that's it for this week, you guys didn't make it very hard on me this time around. Maybe next week people will be curious about more things.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

mmmmmm....shiny

Had to go out and buy myself a new gadget today. I get a lot of use out my MP3 players working 12 hour night shifts and I really liked my iPod Shuffle because it was near indestructible and had enough battery life to last the night. The thing it didn't have though that drove me nuts was a jog wheel and far to often I'd accidentally hit the skip button halfway through an hour long or more podcast. So I cracked open the piggy bank and sprang for this cool as hell new 2nd generation iPod Nano. Playing with it for the last hour or so, it's shaping up to be a pretty cool toy. I'll give a better review after I've played with it for a week or so.

Some humpday stress relief

Let me know if you beat my high score of 1056.

Link

Still time...

There is still time to get in your questions for this weeks edition of Ask Jason Anything.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

Always read the warnings carefully...

Monday, September 25, 2006

Some funny for your Monday.

There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market. A man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man replied that he did not need a whole head, but only a half head. The boy said he would go ask his manager about the matter.

The boy walked into the back room and said, "there is some asshole out there who wants to buy only a half a head of lettuce." As he was finishing saying this he turned around to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, "and this gentleman wants to buy the other half".

The manager okayed the deal and the man went on his way. Later the manager called on the boy and said, "you almost got yourself in a lot of trouble earlier, but I must say I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of it. You think on your feet and we like that around here. Where are you from son?"

The boy replied, "Canada. sir."

"Oh really? Why did you leave Canada?" asked the manager.

The boy replied, "They're all just whores and hockey players up there."

"My wife is from Canada!!" said the manager.

The boy replied, "Really? What team did she play for?"

Ask Jason Anything: VI

That's right, it's time for the 6th installment of our regular Monday feature at Jason's Incredibly Lame Blog, Ask Jason Anything. So fire away with whatever questions you've been searching for answers to and I'll do my best to fill in the blanks for you. As always the answer will be posted on Thursday.

Sunday, September 24, 2006

Here we go again...

Despite what I think was a very generous offer from Sludge to put an end to the feud between the Stern Fan Network and Val, Val has put up a new abridged version of her Stern Fans are Evil page, It's as biased as it ever was, just a quicker read now. I guess her very important guest was done using her page for research into how video games are turning children into soulless killing machines.

She ends the post with this line, "At the moment, however, I'm pretty much finished with these bozos." If that's the case then why wouldn't you simply take Sludge up on his offer, drop the page and your campaign against Howard Stern entirely, and raise some money for cause you claim to champion? Is your ego such that you can't admit you were wrong even if it will help out people in need?

Couch Potato

Joy, the new TV season is in full swing, finally some decent shows to watch again.

Here's a list of things new shows I'm going to try out:

Heroes (NBC, Mondays starting today) - A show about ordinary people who start to develop amazing abilities. It's got a pretty good chance of sucking, but I'll give it a few episodes to see if the writers can pull it off.
30 Rock (NBC, Fridays starting Oct. 11) - Behind the scenes of a sketch comedy show written by and starring the always sharp and witty Tina Fey, who knows a thing or two about the goings on at a sketch comedy show.
Shark (CBS, Thursdays starting last week) - I'll have to grab a copy of the first episode off the Internet and give it a try. I'm a sucker for lawyer dramas and CBS must think pretty highly of the show to give it the time slot right after CSI.

And that's about it from the crop of new shows. Everything else looks pretty bland, but that's pretty much par for the course, not many shows get through an entire first season without being cancelled or completely reworked these days.

Some movie advice

Get away from your computer and go see Little Miss Sunshine right now. Yes, I'm talking to you. I mean it. Stop reading this and go. Why are you still reading this? Go. Now.

Friday, September 22, 2006

They Hang Elephants, Don't They?

Diet Update

Weighed myself again this morning and I'm down to 297.5. Go me!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Ask Jason Anything 5: Answers

Here we go with this weeks answers. Thanks for all the questions.

Gwenhwyfar writes:

Know anyone who'd want to have some make-up done and pictures taken?

I don't know anyone that would do that willingly, I can think of several people I would like to see tortured by you doing a life mask of them and such. Reid Would in fact make an excellent faced boy, and really it would only require about 20 minutes of make-up.

Who's your favourite super hero?

Spider-man, the flawed everyman who had great powers thrust upon him and used them to do good instead of the much easier and more tantalizing evil.

Where be yer burried treasure?

Garrrrrrrh, I can't be telling you that lass, now stay your tongue before I have you keel hauled.

Anonymous writes:

Why do daytime soaps suck so hard?

Because they are only watched by bored women who can't tell good story telling from a hole in the ground. This allows soap producers to hire any schmuck off the street and the cheaper they'll work the better.

Sludge writes:

Do you think Val will pay attention to you nowe that Macheson has deleted his blog entries about her?

I doubt that Val wants to enter into a battle of wits with me. It would be like Lennox Lewis boxing Mr. Rogers.

Do you think Val has harrier armpits than me?

I'm going to guess that she doesn't, but I've never seen either one of your armpits so I could be wrong.

Do you think Val's testicles stink?

Even the most annoying joyless woman doesn't have testicles so by default I'd guess she doesn't suffer from stinky balls.

Why do farts smell more/better in the shower?

A combination of the confined space and the heat of the shower water causing an updraft that pushes those wonderful aromas straight to your nose.

Holly writes:

Why does Darryn suck so hard?

I expect it has something to do with his parents giving him a girls name.

Why does it take so long for them to fill your prescription at the pharmacy?

Some ancient riddles are too hard for even the great Jason to answer.

What is the sound of one hand clapping?

The noise the drummer from Def Leppard makes when he like something?

Time for a face lift

I decided to give the blog a face lift complete with some new toys. You'll note the tabs at the top of the page, they'll always show the 5 most frequently used labels on his blog and clicking on one will show all the posts with that label. Also I added "peek-a-boo" posts so that when I write an overly long rant it doesn't overwhelm your screen (You can check it out on the post below this one). Big thanks to Ramani at Hackosphere for coming up with so many cool hacks for Blogger Beta, keep it up. If you want to add some pizazz to your blog you should go check out his stuff. So what does everyone think of the new look?

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Some reviews...

I don't give my opinion on things enough, so every once in a while I'll just unload with my thoughts on various movies, TV shows, gadgets, services, whatever. These will not be in depth studies, I'll just let you know what my thoughts are.

First up is the Oral-B Hummingbird. I'm loving this little gadget. Basically it's tooth flossing device that massages your gums as you floss. It works great and my gums have never been so healthy. The real test will be to see what my dental hygienist has to say in November when I have my next appointment but I'm sure it will be one of the best and quickest trips to the dentist I've had in years.

I watched the first 5 episodes of the second season of Weeds the other night and it is without a doubt the smartest comedy on television. The story of Nancy the pot dealing soccer mom is really hitting it's stride in it's Sophomore season. Every episode adds more layers to the story and keeps you wanting more.

The new Outkast album Idlewild is amazing. A complete departure from anything that they have done before, it borrows heavily from 30's style jazz and blues with a healthy dose of 70's R&B and funk. It's one of a very few albums put out in recent years that I listen to all the way through every time I play it. I can't even pick a favourite song because the entire disc is just that solid.

Darrrrrh, It be the bestest holiday of the year today mateys.

http://www.talklikeapirate.com/

Monday, September 18, 2006

Ask Jason Anything 5

That's right kids it's time for another round of Ask Jason Anything. Feel free to ask whatever you'd like and I'll attempt to answer your questions as well (or as funny) as possible. As always answers on Thursday.

Sunday, September 17, 2006

She doesn't just hate Howard

I've been somewhat one dimensional in my bickering with Kooky Val and some who haven't read her site might believe her to just be against Howard Stern, a somewhat reasonable position, as I understand that his brand of humour isn't for everyone. That doesn't make it right to take that humour away from those who do like it, but I can understand the position. On the contrary however there are many things she doesn't like. Rap music for instance. She has campaigned to prevent tens of thousands of paying fans from seeing acts such as Eminem or 50 Cent perform, and has also tried to persuade major record stores from carrying Rap. She has an entire page on her site dedicated to "music" but the only thing she fights against is rap. There is a lot of Metal and Punk out there that carry a much more racist and violent message, but she doesn't seem to care about that. She filed a complaint with the police about Bell Express-Vu showing pornographic movies on Pay-Per-View. That's right she thinks that she has the right to dictate what content adults can watch in their own homes. She also has a bug up her ass about violent Video games and this weekend unveiled her latest page on the subject, a collection of media clippings about the Dawson College shooter, Kimveer Gill. Of course she put the article that she is quoted in at the top of the list. The writer Mike Strobel of the Toronto Sun seems to have a somewhat irritating writing style where one sentence equals one paragraph, but I'll quote the relevant passage anyway:

I call Valerie Smith, 54, a neighbour of mine in Scarborough.

Where we live is bounded, roughly, by the Galloway Boys, the Markham-Eglinton Crew and the Versace Boys.

The Montreal Massacre, the original in 1989, inspired her to become an anti-violence crusader. (See www.fradical.com)

In '89, the deadliest video game was Pong, but that's sure changed, eh Val? Now, 401 video games are rated M for blood 'n guts. (Like that'll stop any kid who wants one.)

"The problem has exploded," says Val.

"As opposed to just fighting monsters, it's getting more and more personal. You get to kill people with all manner of instruments.

"And virtual reality is coming. What do you think will happen when some kid can immerse himself so totally he can't tell the difference between real life and fantasy?"

First up, Pong wasn't the most violent video game available in 1979 let alone 1989. Depending on the study up to 95% of Canadian teens report that they have access to video games with upwards of 80% owning at least one video game console of their own. So why aren't our streets crawling with homicidal maniacs? Why is it even possible for me to walk the 2 blocks to work without having to dodge gunfire? With so many of out children being corrupted you would think that our society would have devolved into a complete state of chaos by now. Hmmmmm...perhaps Video games and music aren't to blame. Maybe society should take a look for other factors. Anyone want to wager on how happy of a home life Kimveer Gill had? Anyone want to wager as to whether or not he had been abused physically or mentally? These would seem like far more likely triggers for someone to become a sociopathic killing machine than what games they play. But hey slapping "Video Game Killer" in 72 point print on the cover of your piece of shit tabloid newspaper helps sales.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Diet Update

It's been a while since I posted about the diet. All is still going well, the only junk food I really get cravings for is pizza, but so far I've managed to resist them. I was frustrated that I hadn't lost so much as a single pound for 2 weeks after my last post, but this week I got on the scale and 5 pounds had mysteriously vanished since last week. For those of you keeping score at home that puts me down to 301 lbs.

Friday, September 15, 2006

A Moderate Victory

From her holy kookiness's site:

I have to take this page off line for a bit. We're having visitors tomorrow - a reporter is referencing this site in an article on video games - and I have to make it family friendly again. Can't risk people doing a search on the site and coming up with the Sterniacs obscene comments. The search engine seems to collect everything.

The Sterniacs can yammer away among themselves for awhile - that's pretty much all they do anyway - and this page will be back before they know it. If the spirit moves me in the meantime, I'll boil it down to a few paragraphs so people don't have to wade through so much to find information. I'm torn about including the obscene postings from the Stern Fan Network. They're useful to illustrate the ethics and mindset of the posters, particularly *** ***** and ***** *******, but I never liked having them on my site. I'll have to think about that.

In the meantime, I think the page has been cached by Google, so it might continue to turn up if people do an Internet search. I'm not sure how that works once the page has been taken off the host site. I'll check it out in a few days.

Valerie Smith
September 14, 2006

Yep, I'm declaring a limited victory for the fans of free speech in regards to Val's feud with the members of the Stern Fan Network. Looks to me like she doesn't want some reporter to see that the way she conducts business. I won't miss your jack booted, thought police-like ways. I do wish I knew which reporter would be silly enough to use your site as a reference tool though, I'd write a letter to his editor. Is it your obedient lapdog Alan Cairns again? Oh and Val, no one told you that you had to post all those comments on your site, if you aren't happy with them being there it's no one's fault but your own.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Former teacher: Sex with pupil 'really bad choice'

I'll take headlines that make me say "Duh" for $1000, Alex.

CNN

Ask Jason Anything 4.5: Answers

Ok, Let's see what's in the mail bag this week.

gwenyfer writes:

Why does Selma Blair have to suck so bad? Why?! And why in the hell are they bringing her back to crap up the second Hellboy movie? Sweet Jesus, Why?!

The cause of both problems is Reese Witherspoon. Everything she comes into contact with somehow manages to turn to both shit and gold at the same time. Movie after movie with inane plot lines and horrible acting that somehow rake in money by the dump truck full. She seems to be able to infect co-stars now as well. Despite a complete lack of ability they continue to find work. And then inexplicably the movies don't tank and they get more work...it's a vicious cycle. Look for Joaquin Phoenix to star in Teletubbies: The Movie sometime in 2009. It'll gross $784 million worldwide.

lucybfly writes:

What is the meaning of...death? :)

All stories need an ending. [=|:-P

raivyn writes:

Snorkel or avocado?

Snorkel, I fucking hate avocados. Even if I'm starving to death I'll eat the snorkel first.

two write hands writes:

How many times have you "left a penny" at the convenience store?

On the floor when I've exactly dropped one? Dozens. In the tray for the deadbeats who can't afford the extra 2 cents? Zero.

That's it for this week.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Seriously, She needs to get a life.

Good old Kooky Val has updated her Stern Fans page 6 days in a row now. Let's take a look at some of her new pearls of wisdom. Names have been redacted to protect the innocent victims of Val's campaign of hatred (oooooohh, how'd you like that spin move?)

September 8: Interesting thing I discovered today. A guy named ********* and Sludge have the same IP address. Hmmm... what are the odds they're not the same person. Oh, none! Stats are up for this page, but I think it's probably ******* checking in every five minutes to see if I've posted his mug shot along with Dumb and Dumber. Not yet, *******, but do stay tuned.

Uh oh, after only 6 months of investigation she has deduced sludge's real name, but what could she possibly do with that information?

****** ****** - come on down! The beauty of knowing Sludge's real identity is this: I can, should I feel it's necessary -- and the option is entirely mine -- apply for a peace bond to keep him away from me, file a private information (look it up), file a human rights complaint (a hate campaign using the Internet is right up their alley and they award damages), file a civil lawsuit, stuff like that. I did what you're supposed to do when harassed on the Internet, I reported it to the police. Unfortunately, as mentioned on the Industry Canada website, the police can do little about cyber bullying, which is another name for what ****** ********, ***** ********* and ****** ******* have been up to. However, there are other options once you know the identity of the bully. Thanks for sending me that email, ******. Absolutely brilliant.

Okie Dokie, I have my doubts about the court giving you a peace bond against someone who has never threatened you in any way nor ever been within 5KM of you either. File a human rights complaint? It isn't a hate crime to hate an individual person, but good luck with that. File a lawsuit? Good way to prove that you aren't an opponent of free speech, just sue anyone who voices a differing opinion.

And ******* ******, who, it turns out actually is a teacher, the Ontario Ministry of Education has policies on bullying which include cyber bullying. You really should look them up. Possibly, teachers are exempt, but I think that's entirely unlikely. Afterall, you're supposed to be setting an example

Wow, threatening the financial security of someone who disagrees with you. Can I get your mailing address? I'd like to send you a container of polish so you can put a nice shine on your jack boots.

September 9: Apparently, ****** ****** hasn't been reading the memos. Cyber bullying includes postings to chat groups, you know, like the one ****** ****** started about me back in February? Ringing any bells, ********? The one that contains what reporter Al Cairns called "a series of profane and vile chat entries" about me, the one that made me concerned enough about the content to report it to police, the one that contains comments the Attorney General calls "very disturbing"? You know, the chat group you've been posting to since it started on day one? Yeah, Acheson, that one.

Actually I believe that letter says "The types of comments you've received" not "The types of things people write about you on the Internet". But please feel free to point out any case law where someone has been convicted of cyber bullying for things posted to a publicly accessible forum.

September 12: I posted a comment to ****** ****** blog which he promptly deleted. Strange that, since he invited me to contact him directly, plus he's such a big defender of free speech. The nice thing is, he also deleted all his own postings about me. Gee, was it something I said?

I'm sad that your thug tactics do seem to have silenced a voice with a dissenting opinion to that of yours, but I can understand his not wanting to risk his teaching job in a fight with a kook. Teacher's these days are always under a microscope and school boards seem quick to dismiss one rather than deal with any static from the public. I hope you are proud of yourself.

September 13: ***** ******** is implying on his blog that I would hurt his little boy. Like I said, the Internet really brings out the stupid in people.

This from the person who voiced a concern in one of the largest circulating daily papers in the country that because of her views horrible things could happen to anyone with the misfortune of having the incredibly uncommon name Valerie Smith. Yep that Internet really does bring out the stupid.

Once again Val, maybe you should just let the whole thing drop. None of your high profile attempts at censoring speech, music or film have ever worked out in your favour. Eminem has played concerts in Canada. Rap music is still available at HMV. Hardcore pornography is still available on every cable and satellite system in the country and Howard Stern is still available legally in this great country. I suggest that you may want to retire and take up knitting but you'd probably end up making a bunch of one armed sweaters and 3 fingered gloves. You just can't ever seem to get anything right.

Bush to hold talks on Ali G creator after diplomatic row

US President George Bush is to host White House talks on British comedian Sacha Baron Cohen.

Cohen, 35, creator of Ali G, has infuriated the Kazakhstan government with his portrayal of Borat, a bumbling Kazakh TV presenter.

And now a movie of Borat's adventures in the US has caused a diplomatic incident.

Read Full Article

Gee, I'm glad Bush isn't wasting his time figuring out an exit strategy for Iraq or how to repair his incredibly poor approval rating. Yes clearly the thing the President of the United States should be most worried about is a character portrayed by a British comedian.

Update: The trailer for anyone who hasn't seen it...

Ain't it the truth: Part 2

Foxtrot by Bill Amend is so bang on some days it's scary.

Monday, September 11, 2006

Ask Jason Anything 4.5

I only got one question last week which I believe is due to Blogger Beta not liking comments from people with non-beta accounts. Remember if you'd like to leave a comment or question you can select "other" and enter your name and a link to your blog if you wish. You can also pose your questions anonymously. So fire away, I love sharing my knowledge. Check back on Thursday for answers. And yes Gwen I will answer your Selma Blair question this week.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Speechless

Wow...just...wow

Ain't it the truth...

Click for full size, should be easier to read that way.

Friday, September 08, 2006

How Superman Should Have Ended

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Grrrrrrr....

Stupid Blogger Beta. Yes, I am now aware that most of you can't post comments on my blog at the current time because you don't all have Blogger Beta accounts. Hopefully they fix this up sometime soon.

As a temporary work-around anonymous commenting still seems to work.

Monday, September 04, 2006

Ask Jason Anything IV

Yep it's that time of week again, time for another scintillating round of "Ask Jason Anything". So fire away with any questions you'd like answered. As always answers on Thursday.

Crikey!

RIP

Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin Killed

Friday, September 01, 2006

I'm not dead yet

I'm not the guy in this article. A heartfelt thanks to those who were concerned.

Red Deer Advocate

Can't seem to link directly to the article...

Tasered Man Dies

By BRENDA KOSSOWAN
Advocate staff
Aug 31 2006

An autopsy will be performed today on a man who had been in a coma since a violent arrest in Red Deer on Aug. 10.
Red Deer RCMP Supt. Brian Simpson confirmed late Wednesday afternoon that Jason Doan, 28, died earlier in the day.
Police used a Taser to subdue a suspect after responding to reports that a man was using a pitchfork to smash vehicles parked along Overdown Drive.
Cpl. Sandy Andrews, a media liaison officer for the City RCMP, confirmed shortly after the incident that police used the Taser — an electric stun gun that causes temporary paralysis — to “assist in apprehending the suspect.”
Andrews indicated at the time that the suspect resisted arrest and an altercation ensued, during which a police officer and a citizen were both injured.
Doan collapsed at the scene and eyewitness said they saw fire-medics administering CPR before the ambulance took him away.
Days after the arrest, police declined to shed further light on what had happened at the scene, confirming only that officers hit Doan three times with the Taser.
Police did not say whether Doan suffered other injuries during the arrest or if he had a pre-existing condition that may have led to his collapse.
Simpson later said the RCMP view Tasers — Taser International’s trademark name for a conducted energy weapon — as a safe use of force that poses less risk than other forms of control, such as firearms.
Simpson said that he knows of no incident where a Taser has been directly linked to the death of a suspect.
Amnesty International, however, reports that 14 people in Canada died after being Tasered between April 2003 and December 2005.
Tasers administer a shock of up to 50,000 volts.
In a brief statement issued late Wednesday, Andrews said Doan’s death is under investigation by the Alberta Medical Examiner and that the Calgary Police Service is reviewing the investigation.
Doan’s family has declined to speak about his death or the incidents leading up to it.

Thursday, August 31, 2006

Ask Jason Anything III: Answers

You guys came through in the last few hours and now I finally have some questions to answer so let's just jump right in.

What is your theory about sex live.

uhhh...I greatly prefer it to sex dead.

Where does all the white go when the snow melts

I believe it is harvested and used to cover the legs of the 80 year old men in shorts I see every time I go to the mall.

What would you do for a klondike bar?

I would graciously decline the klondike bar, still sticking to the diet.

Oh and..how do you get a dog to stop eating electronic devices...ex. cell phones, cd players, key fobs, etc. If you can answer that with something that works, you are my new hero.

Would obedience school be an option perchance? If not might I suggest not leaving things that you don't want eaten where the dog can reach them?

What is one plus one?

oneone.

Why Do word verification have to be so darn difficult to read?

The thing is, they don't have to be. They only have to be in a picture to stop the automated spammers. A simple English word displayed the same way would serve the same purpose. My guess is that they are just trying to dupe you into thinking they are doing more to prevent spamming than they actually are.

Assuming the existance of God is George Bush the penalty for our sin or the reward for our goodness?

Ahhh a mixing of politics and religion, always fun subjects to combine. I'm sure that George would tell you that he was the latter as he does seem to believe himself to be an outstanding example of virtue and morality, but does a virtuous and moral person lead a crusade against a vastly overpowered foe for no apparent reason whatsoever? I would like to think not. But is he evil? I don't believe that to be case either. I think of him as a simple person easily swayed by those around him. So I'm going to have to cop out a little on your Question Dr. John and say that he is neither. Dick Cheney on the other hand...Well, he makes me glad I live in Canada.

Well that's all that was in the mailbag this week. I hope everyone is enjoying reading these as much as I am writing them.

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Ask Jason Anything: Still time...

No one has any questions this week? I'm sure someone out there is wondering something. You still have another day to get those questions in, leave them in the comments section of the previous Ask Jason Anything post.

Monday, August 28, 2006

Accusing someone of paranoia doesn't make you any less paranoid.

My feelings have been hurt today. Our dear friend kooky Val updated her kooky website over the weekend this time to fire some shots at someone who has blogged about her ineffective campaign to have Howard Stern pulled off the air in Canada. The blogger in question wasn't me. What the hell Val? I'm king of the anti-Val bloggers (well in my own mind anyway, I can be delusional).

Anywho here's the guy she went after, I linked to him several months ago as well. Kooky Val had this to say:

He has a personal blog on which he posts seriously boring information about himself and comments about me which usually involve calling me a liar.
Michael Acheson also participates in Sludge's harassment thread on the Stern Fan Network under the name Macheson. This is interesting because comments he posted to his blog raise the possibility that he's a teacher (click here for posting). He's probably not a teacher though. I can't imagine a teacher being stupid enough to collaborate with someone who posts comments like this in a public forum. And that's mild, compared to Sludge's usual obscene comments, or these from some of the other participants. Nice company you keep, Mr. Acheson.

Note all those links there, they all lead to .pdf's she made of people insulting her. Which brings us to her next post:

Did some tidying up on this page for ease of reference. Messrs Acheson and Flood think changes to this page are noteworthy. They're not, really. It's standard ops to update a web site. But you two better print this new version off, just in case. You can never be too careful. Or paranoid.

Uhhhh, hey Kooky lady, you go to the effort of saving .pdf's of it every time someone mentions your name for fear that the posting will disappear before you can bother the police with some sort of bullshit harassment beef, fearing not just for yourself but for anyone who happens to be named Valerie Smith. Who exactly is the paranoid one?

Ask Jason Anything III

Well it's Monday again at the Incredibly Lame Blog and that means it's time for another round of Ask Jason Anything. Feel free to let lose with questions on any topic you'd like and I'll attempt to answer them, or at least be humourous in my attempt to answer them. As always answers will be posted on Thursday.

A weekend of firsts.

Did a couple of things I'd never done before this weekend (get your minds out of the gutters you sickos).

On Friday myself and she who can't be named on this blog took in our first horse show, uhhh, as spectators not as horses. There was some nice looking horses, but for the cost of buying an Arabian horse I'd much rather buy a Ferrari.

Saturday saw us attend the first ever Tequila Tasting held at Bushwakker, my favourite pub. I'm not really a connoisseur of tequila, I like it but I can't pontificate on it for hours on end like I can with scotch or beer. I liked most of the tequilas that we sampled, but my favourite of the night was the Cabo Wabo Resposado. The only one I hated was the Mezcal de Oaxaca Scorpion which to me smelled like Parmesan cheese and had a taste I could only describe rancid ass. Oh well you can't like everything I suppose, but it did shock me when the master of ceremonies commented that it was the one that was most highly rated by whichever rating guide they were using that night. She who can not be named in this blog ate the scorpion out of one of the bottles.

Friday, August 25, 2006

Elton John to try 'Candle in the Wiz-ind'?

Weird...

CNN.com - Elton John to try 'Candle in the Wiz-ind'?

I could do this, I just don't wanna

Snakes on a Plane: Could it Motherf#@kin' happen here?

Samantha Bee is awesome

I'd eat there

A look at some of the transformers

Transformers

Some of these look pretty cool...still almost a year to wait for the movie.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Diet Update: Finally

I can finally keep accurate tabs on my weight loss because my scale now seems to work. I stepped on it this morning and it now has a number on it instead of saying "Go away, fatty". So I now officially know that I weigh 307 lbs, I started my diet 6.5 weeks ago weighing ~330 lbs and I'd like to lose another 57 lbs. Watch this space for further updates.

Ask Jason Anything: Round 2 - Answers

A few more questions this week than last week, thanks for participating.

My friend is getting a beige and white, crazy kitten. Any name suggestions?

My suggestions would be either Moo Goo Gai Pan or Mushu Pork, also I would recommend that your friend seek psychiatric help as there is clearly something wrong with someone who would willingly share their home with a cat.

Through a discussion with a nerdy co-worker, it was decided that this question could give good insight into the psyche... If you could be any alien race from Star Trek, which would you be?

Good question. I'd have to pick Romulan. All the cool mind powers of the Vulcans but with a nice evil streak. Plus I hear that Romulan Ale is damn tasty stuff.

Of what possible use is chaos theory?

Chaos Theory is an excellent way for pseudo-intellectual types to get out of actually studying and researching things. Anytime something weird occurs just blame your good buddy Chaos Theory.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

A woodchuck would chuck all the would that a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

What is the meaning of jellybeans?

I have never figured that one out myself. I've planted many of them over the years and never has a mighty jellybean tree sprouted from the ground for me to adequately research...I blame Chaos Theory.

That's all for this week, come back next week for another thrilling installment of Ask Jason Anything.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Quite the spike in traffic today...

I had been averaging 25-30 hits a day but today I had well over 100. What changed you ask? I signed up at Blogmad. I have been a member at blogexplosion for a month or so and they were good for 5-10 hits a day, but it was painful to earn credits there because their site is so slow. No such problems at Blogmad though, the site seems to run as smooth as silk and for every blog you visit they'll send a visitor to your blog, they'll even give you 25 credits right off the bat just for signing up. So if you want a little more traffic going to your site give them a try.

Diet update: Day ??

I forget how many days it's been since I started the diet, 6 weeks or so I think. I think I've lost about 20 pounds but without a scale that can give me an accurate reading of my mass it's hard to know for certain. I do feel a lot better as of late, not so many creaks and pops when I stand up and such and I do seem to have a little more energy. I haven't been exercising enough (well really much at all) the last couple of weeks, something I'll need to rectify. I have managed to not stray from the diet at all which is of course the main thing (except for the trip to the fair). Now if only I could make the last few pounds go away so my scale would work it would be much less frustrating weighing myself.

Fill in the Blank

In this picture Tom Cruise is discussing _________.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Ask Jason Anything: Round 2

It's Monday at the Incredibly Lame Blog and that means it's time for another round of Ask Jason Anything. I'm sure someone out there has something they need answered. Relationship advice? Etiquette Tips? Theoretical physics problem keeping you awake at night? Fire away. Answers on Thursday.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

A word of warning

Dear Shithead Who Tried To Break Into My Car:

Congratulations on being too stupid to figure out how to break into a car, and doing nothing more than busting my door handle and scratching my paint. I can see our public education system continues to pump out a never ending supply of retards. What were you hoping to get? The $2 in parking meter change hidden in my console? If you are too fucking stupid to figure out how to get past the door locks you certainly aren't going to be able to get past the ignition lock. So here's my warning you little piece of shit, I'm keeping my windows open at night, if I hear you come back you are going to understand the meaning of the word pain in a way you never thought possible.

A word of advice

If you are a passenger in a car pulled over by police, and the person driving the car has had 1 beer...4 hours ago...When the police ask the driver if he's been drinking don't yell "YES HE HAS", it makes the whole situation more difficult than it needs to be.

Friday, August 18, 2006

The Daily Show: Target: USA

Some classic game show craziness

Ask Jason Anything: Answers

Here we go...

slackermommy writes:

"I'm embarrassed to ask but what does LMOA mean?"

If you meant to type the common internet shorthand "LMAO", it stands for Laughing My Ass Off, if however that wasn't a typo I have no idea...Little Men Offering Acupuncture?

Holly writes:

Jason, where do babies come from?

Let's see, small crying things that generally get on my nerves...France?

Anonymous writes:

What will it take to get you to bring H.O.H vol.2 to work?

It will take me remembering to throw it in my bag before I come to work on Sunday...I'll write myself a note or something.

Also, do fat-bottomed girls really make the rocking world go round?

I would be inclined to answer yes, but Led Zeppelin trumps Queen and Robert Plant tells us that A big legged woman ain't got no soul, so perhaps rock music doesn't hold all of the answers.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

First Impressions

Things I like about the new version of Blogger:

Labels. Now if you want to see all the posts I've ever made on a topic you just need to click on that label and they will all be neatly arranged on one page for you. Well, they will be once I go back and label all of my old posts, 50 down...200 to go.
Layouts. So much easier to edit than the old templates. A great WYSIWYG interface for changing fonts and colours makes it easy to play with changing the look of your blog. A nice drag and drop interface for arranging information on your blog, and a much more user friendly system for adding links.
No more republishing of the entire blog every time you post. Click on publish and the post is up, no waiting.
Love the new spellchecker, that highlights words in the composer window instead of opening a popup.

Things I dislike about the new version of Blogger:

Limited selection of layouts, and they all look the same.
Can't define the widths of the columns on your layout, I'm back to a 2 column setup that is wasting a ton of space.
Can't currently use a graphic as your header. Come on people, I slaved away in Photoshop for 3 straight minutes to build my logo.

So basically all of my dislikes will go away once they allow users to edit their HTML, as I could fix all of those problems by doing a little bit of coding myself. All in all they seem to have greatly improved from the previous version.

Switched Over

Ok, so I just switched over to the new beta version of Blogger. Let me know if anything isn't working anymore.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

World's smallest revolver and ammunition

I want one.

read more digg story

Google Unveils New Blogger Beta

Looks like some big changes coming for Blogger. I'm most looking forward to the addition of tags. I hope I'll be able to go back and add tags to older posts. Looks like they are also making editing templates easier, which should help some of the less technically savvy users.

read more digg story

Monday, August 14, 2006

Ask Jason Anything

Well that last bit was fun, so I'm starting a new feature on Jason's Incredibly Lame Blog called Ask Jason Anything. The title should be pretty self explanatory but for those of you who are a little on the slow side, it goes like this: Ask me any question you'd like and I'll attempt to answer it. If I can't answer it I'll make some shit up. So go ahead and fire away. I'll post answers to your questions in a couple of days.

Writer's block responses...

Holly writes:

"Steve Earle sucks...talk about that a bit... "

meh, I kinda like Steve Earle. I didn't go to his concert Saturday night or anything, but he rocks pretty hard and has an interesting story of abuse and recovery.

Gwenwyfer writes:

"You haven't said anything about crazy Val in quite some time."

This is in fact true. Unfortunately our dear friend kooky Val hasn't really tossed any of her trademark softballs for me to swing at lately. As of late she's been reduced to posting emails and letters that are sometimes several years old in an attempt to look like she's doing something. Today she posted a picture of "sludge". [sarcasm] I'm sure it will cause him many sleepless nights and may cause him post traumatic stress disorder. I hope he sues. [/sarcasm]

Kermit the frog on The Daily Show

Writer's Block

I have nothing really to type about at the moment. Leave me some topics in the comments and I'll see what I can do with them.

Friday, August 11, 2006

Manamana

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Some of the most amazing Sept 11th pictures you will ever see

A photographer, who had worked for an alternative New York picture agency, had been carrying three cameras with him, when he left his home in Manhattan that sparkling Tuesday morning, and started walking south towards the plumes of smoke. He took some pretty amazing (and disturbing) pictures.

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How NOT to Release a Leopard

hehehe...

read more digg story

Wednesday, August 09, 2006

I'm on notice!

What the heck did I do to piss off Stephen Colbert?
Make your own on notice board.

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Amazing Pool Tricks

Working guitar made out of Lego

Sweet!

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Another Diet Update

The scale still isn't working for me, but I do feel lighter. I don't seem to creak and moan as much when I get up in the morning and I think I'm feeling healthier. The diet did go out the window for a few hours over the weekend, because we just couldn't not go to the fair. We were much better than we usually are at the fair this year. I had one souvlaki instead of my usual 3, half a bag of mini donuts instead of my usual 3, half an elephant ear instead of 1 of my own, a smoked meat sandwich instead of a greasy fried burger or pizza slice and 1 root beer instead of the usual 3 or 4. All in all not too horrible of a stray from the diet.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Opinions?

Would a tattoo of Tattoo be really really cool, or really really uncool? What if he was chilling on Tattooine?

Ann Coulter shows her ignorance yet again

PWNED! as the kids say.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Regina part of a Zionist plot?

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

A handy tip.

If you've had a caesarian section, no matter how good of shape you get back into, wandering around downtown wearing a belly shirt and a pair of daisy dukes is gross.

$25 million Creation Museum being built in Kentucky

Like most natural history museums, this one has exhibits showing dinosaurs roaming the earth. Except here, the giant reptiles share the forest with Adam and Eve.

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....

read more digg story

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

YouTube Overtakes MySpace

YouTube has established itself at the top of the league of the new generation of community websites by becoming even more popular than MySpace, according to research. According to Nielsen/NetRatings, YouTube's American user base grew by 297% in the first half of the year.

read more digg story

Monday, July 31, 2006

Diet update: Come on you stupid scale...

Damn thing stilll won't give me a reading. Haven't had any junk food whatsoever in over 3 weeks. Took a 6Km walk on Wednesday and a 5Km walk on Sunday. Managed to do 75 situps this morning.

meh.

Well I'm a little disappointed with what I just heard. It appears that the opening act for the Stones concert is going to be Three Days Grace. I don't really have anything against Three Days Grace, they just sound like every other 3 piece pseudo-punk band on the mainstream rock charts these days. After checking out reviews of the previous Stones shows on this tour and seeing opening acts like Beck, The Tragically Hip, Black Eyed Peas and Trey Anastasio of Phish I was hoping they'd come up with a big name opener. Oh well, just another example of doing things half assed in Regina, like the Grey Cup halftime "entertainment" of Bryan Adams.

Don't try this at home kiddies

Dry Ice - video powered by Metacafe

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Top Gear - Ariel Atom

Now this is a fun looking car.

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Lindsay Lohan Gets Slammed by Hollywood BigWig!

"You have acted like a spoiled child and in doing so have alienated many of your coworkers and endangered the quality of this picture" said CEO of Morgan Creek, the production company behind Lohan's upcoming movie "Georgia Rule".

Someone finally decided to to call out one of these new 20 something airhead actors who think their shit doesn't stink. Nice to see, hope it's a trend that continues.

read more digg story

Stephen Colbert - Better Know a District - Washington D.C.

Thursday, July 27, 2006

Score!

Guess who's going to be watching Mick and the boys rock out from 17 rows away from the stage.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Tickets for Oliver Stone lecture on sale

This looks like an enlightening evening, I'm going to go for sure.

Tickets are now available for Academy Award-winning director and filmmaker Oliver Stone's lecture at the University of Regina. The lecture will take place Wed., Oct. 18 at 7 p.m. at the Education Auditorium. Tickets are $15 and can be purchased at the Conexus Arts Centre Box Office in person or by calling 525-9999.

Stone's talk kicks off the new Rethinking Productivity Speaker Series, presented by the Social Policy Research Unit in the Faculty of Social Work at the U of R. Speakers will look at ways in which modern democracy can divert governments from focusing solely on the interests of the rich and powerful.

Stone, a filmmaker and novelist, is a constant advocate for freedom of thought, art and political opinion. He has been nominated for 11 Academy Awards as a screenwriter, director and producer, and has won Oscars for the films Born on the Fourth of July, Platoon, and Midnight Express. His latest film, World Trade Center, will be released on Aug. 9.

Woot!

Got a letter in the mail today from the Roughriders. Apparently my otherwise completely worthless Rider Share allows me to purchase up to 8 of the best seats in the house 4 days before tickets go on sale to the general public. Anyone looking for a seat?

Diet: Day 17 - I want a slice of pizza

I do, I really really do. I'm not going to have one, but I'd really like to. The scale still runs in fear of me, but I did manage to do 50 situps yesterday and sixty today, I'll attempt 75 tomorrow. Stupid Buffalo Days is coming next week and I don't know what to do. I've been so good at sticking to my diet, but the food at the fair isn't exactly healthy. As if to mock me, the fair hasn't featured any good entertainment in 4 or 5 years and Wednesday night they have an excellent pairing of Captain Tractor and Spirit of the West on the grandstand.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Metallica catalog now on iTunes

After refusing to offer their music on the iTunes Music Store when it first opened, it seems like the boys from Metallica have decided to listen to their fans and offer their catalog at the popular digital music store.

Hi, my name is Lars Ulrich and I'm incredibly short sighted. I didn't want to commit to anything until I was sure I could buy another dump truck full of ivory back scratchers from the deal, and now it seems this iTunes thingy is here to stay, so have at it sheep, fill my bank account with your money.

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Babylon 5 returns

One of the greatest sci-fi series of all time will return in a series of direct-to-DVD mini movies. They will be written and directed by J. Michael Straczynski and we can expect the first set to be released during the second quarter of 2007.

I don't actually care about this as I never really liked B5, but I know a few people that read my blog like B5. Now if they were doing new "episodes" of Straczynski's vastly superior Jeremiah, then I'd be excited.

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Monday, July 24, 2006

Some movies I've seen recently

Superman Returns - I liked it for the most part. The only thing I didn't like in it was the stupid tacked on storyline with the kid, blechhhh. Why did you have to do that Bryan Singer? Why?

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest - possibly the longest movie title of the year. I wasn't a huge fan of the first one and was basically dragged to this one by she who can't be mentioned in this blog. I liked this one a lot more than the first one, nothing but nonstop swashbuckling pirate action.

Clerks II - If you were a fan of the original you'll love this. If you hated the original you probably shouldn't waste your time or money on this. I loved the original, and laughed my ass off through this entire movie. Randall is one of the greatest characters in movie history, his rant about Lord of the Rings is an instant classic.

Tarantino Confirms More Kill Bill!

"Tarantino spilled the beans that once he finishes 'Death Proof' he will begin working on two more 'Kill Bill' films! Both films will be animated..."

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Cats that look like Hitler

Stephen Hawking: "Europe Should Not Follow Bush On Stem Cells"

Stephen Hawking criticized President Bush and European states that are trying to ban stem cell research.

Hmmmm, should we listen to one of the smartest people who has ever lived or some redneck with no science education who answers to the name Dubya?

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